nun shoes

There's something about hitting 40, everything starts going south, so as you look down to watch how far south it goes, you see something down there. Your feet. And you say, "Maybe I should get some killer shoes."

I mean, in the 90's I had some great biker chick boots and I was doing Carmen Miranda Biker Chick and the Jolly Plump Tap Dancing Dominatrix, you know, styles that have a certain cachet, something sexy and dangerous and in the case of tap dancing, loud. And then in the Aughts (what else do we call this decade?) I had a pair of really comfortable orange clogs, I wore them all the time and I looked like Donald Duck. And that's what a decade can do for you, you go from Carmen Miranda Biker Chick to Donald Duck. But while I lived in New York and could wear groovy shoes, I was faced here in Sacto with a need to get a pair of shoes that went with a suit skirt. And so I got these ones with buttons. They remind me of nun shoes. I hate them. I was going on the first of about nine thousand fruitless job interviews and I knew I couldn't wear dirty old orange clogs with a 400 dollar aubergine suit. So I bought these nun shoes.

I can hear you, you are saying "they're not bad."

But I FEEL constrained in them, I feel they are not groovy. I FEEL that nuns could mug me for them. And everything has gone south now and the only thing I have left is my feet. When I was in my 20s and 30s I wore comfortable shoes and eschewed silly high heeled pumps. And dangerous frosty platforms. But I had cleavage then.

But now? I could do with a bit of heel and some danger. So on my last interview, I was wearing a lovely blue grey suit and the dreaded nun shoes. But I popped into a shoe store downtown and bought these blue ostrich cowboy boots. They look great with my pant suit, but here in this photo they are paired with my jeans.

Wouldn't you rather hire a woman wearing blue cowboy boots rather than nun shoes? I mean this is Sacramento, there are actual COWS, I'm just blending into the crowd.